What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

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Why were there a series of riots in london? The police shot and killed a man who was threatening them and thus caused his friends to get angry and caused other people to lose control.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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Two fish are swimming and hit a cement wall. One fish says Dam.

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What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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A blonde walked into a bar.

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Sarah Palin

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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What is a bad thing to see and is attached to a boy's body. The middle finger u dumb ass!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm ovulating

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So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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