So much with being an author... You with the Feds? The CIA?

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100 chefs walk into a bar

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Q : What is the similarity between me and my friend? A : We both are crazy

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Doctor doctor, I feel like listening to good music. Looks like you need "The Cure" to help with this.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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Why was the man sad? Cause his dog fell off a cliff

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Why did a vampire climb Mount Everest in the middle of the night on his birthday in September?

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

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Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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Q: What's soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Win industrial estate, Newry

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- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

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Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

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An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

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Women drivers...

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What did the poor family eat for thanksgiving? Food

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Q: What's worst than the Holocaust? A: 6 million Jews

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What happened to the mentaly retarted gentleman walking down the street? Nothing bad. He might a very fine woman and the went to dinner shortly after.

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What happens when you try to rescue a cat from a tree? It jumps on your face, falls down, and dies.

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How come there aren't any Mexicans on Star Trek? The show already had several minority characters, and the producers felt that the addition of a Hispanic actor or actress would have added nothing of value to the series.

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Hey do you want to hear the joke about my d**k?? I cant tell it because it's to long

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No one walks into a bar The bar is slowly losing business and will soon be forclosed upon and will also lose his home as a result causing his family and himself to be homeless and slowly suffer on the streets

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Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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