Q. What language cant you speak A.Sign language

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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Dislike if you shag sheep ;)

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What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

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Augustus was touring his Empire and noticed a man in the crowd who bore a striking resemblance to himself. Intrigued, he asked: ‘Was your mother at one time in service at the Palace?’ ‘No, your Highness,’ he replied, ‘but my father was.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? No.

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What's white and hides behind a tree? Shy milk.

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What did the priest say to the rabbi ? I'm gay.

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What do you get when you combine KIA and NOKIA? A cheap vehicle with a cheap mobile phone inside.

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Jews.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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Why did the man fall off the swing? he got hit in the back of the head with a shovel.

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What's worse than getting a jigsaw puzzle for your birthday? Slavery

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Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

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what did the duck say to the hawk? quack

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

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Racial Equality.

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what is small and is not fair Mitt Romneys tax rate

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What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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Im ashamed of being from Canada

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Roses are red violets are blue I hate rhyming pancakes

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

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Q: what's black and white and red all over? A: someone getting murderd on a news paper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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