Three vampires were at a bar 1 & 2 were drinking and asked the 3rd why he wasn't. He replied, I'm full I found a used tampon on my way here.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Pizzas don't scream when you put them in the oven.

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 1

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What did your father say before he died? Nothing, he's already dead

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What smells, tastes, and looks like trash? Garbage.

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Why doesn't Santa Claus like cantaloupe? Because he doesn't exist. You have to exist to like cantaloupe.

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Two people were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

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whats better than shoes feet

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How do you get a bunch of Pokémon onto a bus? You tell them to ride a bus

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, hes Jewish.

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What's worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust.

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KEVIN HART

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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What do you call a fat Mexican? Whatever his name is.

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Why did the man eat the apple? Because he was hungry.

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

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It's your mother, open the door.

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because he was dead...

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Why was Six afraid of Seven? During the crossover episode of Blossom and Star Trek: Voyager. Six traveled ahead to the distant future and found herself on the aforementioned starship. Her situation was confusing and frightening, even more so when the half-female, half-Borg appeared before her.

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a fat black man walks into an aquarium he enjoyed his day viewing many sea animals while buying a souvenier on his way out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running. From the forest. That hell hole. He had got away, but he could remember. The darkness. The silence. Until the unmistakable scream of the guns and then- The Running. The Screaming. The Blood, oh the blood. Seeing Charlie. Oh, that damned soul Charlie. The bullet went right- But that was long ago. So long. But sometimes, in the silence, Chicken remembers. The Running. The Screaming. The Blood. And he screams.

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yo mama's so sexy... wait, thats not how it goes

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What do you get when you cross Arsene Wenger with Darth Vader? Arsene Vader

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops