A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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Where was Susie when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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throbbing slobber

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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Why is Digimon better than Pokemon? It has a better story and character development.

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What do u call someone who lies? Jack eckert qnd colin

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Q: Why did the monkey climb a tree? A: To avoid predators.

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What did the human say to the human? You are a human.

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Do you want to hear a joke? Sure. Justin Bieber is straight.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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Who is Red and White and comes on Christmas? A Russian Candy Cane

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Q: why did the black man cry when he went to bed? A: he had just had a visit from the police and apparently his family had been tragically killed in a car accident.

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What did the mouse say to the elephant? Squeak.

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Q: What is green, blue, white and red? A: They're colors

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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So a Jew, a black guy, and a Mexican all walk into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey guys, what would you like?" They all get beer.

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how does peploe get around they walk

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A pregnant woman takes the bus, once inside she realizes that there are no seats. No one was pollite enough to let her sit down so she felt pretty uncomfortable on the way home.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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Why Because

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- If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together. - You don't need to because N and O are already together. - Then maybe a cyber-relationship would work. - Why ? - Look at your keyboard, U and I are next to each other.

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what is fat and ugly. fat and ugly people

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Amputations.

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What did Pikachu say to Ghandi? Pika Pika

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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