Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He had a heart attack

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Why couldn't the man get up to obtain a beverage? His legs were broken.

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What did the child with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dyeing.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What's worse than having but sex and finding out you have aids? Knowing that the person you had sex with was dead

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Chuck Norris died.

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You know that you are going to fail horribly when... your purpose generally defeats the mission.

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What happens to koala bears when the forests of Australia catch on fire? They burn.

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What's the worst part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap. What's the best part about having sex with a two year old? -Hearing the hip bone snap.

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Knock Knock Come in.

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What happens when you touch a curling iron to your arm? You get burned.

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Whats Orange,Leathery gets passed around by sweaty dudes and the next name will start with an S Snooki

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France never surrender.

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Knock Knock Who's there A pile up A pile up who

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wat?

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Guess what? Chicken butt

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Knock, knock. Who's there? The police. I'm afraid there's been an accident. Your spouse is in hospital.

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What did the old man say to his grandson before he kicked the bucket?? "I wonder how far i can kick this bucket..."

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Why was the clown murdered? Because it laughed at my cousin so he ran right into the icicle 10 times to the heart

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Im not racist i love black people i have 5 of them.

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Why does six love nine? They both get pleasured

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cannibal. Cannibal wh... As the man opened the door, he was eaten. And they lived happily ever after. The end.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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