What do friends and potatoes have in common? If you eat them, they will die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. It was a footless chicken.

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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What's the difference between a bag full of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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I am so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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Robin get in the batmobile!

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A man went to the doctor and told him he was having the strangest dream. "First I was a tee pee Then I was a wigwam A tee pee, a wigwam. Do you have any idea what could be wrong?" The doctor looked at the man and said "You have aids."

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Q: Why was 6 afraid of 7? A: He wasn't, it turns out 7 was afraid of 6 because 6 beat 7 up in high school

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Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

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whats super and the champions of europe? Leeds United

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What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

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so a boy walks into a bar he was underage and escorted out.

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Why didn't the teenager go to high school? He was murdered

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Why did the man staple his own scrotum to his left thigh? He didn't. His friends did.

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Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

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Q:What's funny about a Jew marrying a Nazi? A:The situation

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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jack and jill went up the hill to have a little fun. that dumb ass jill forgot the pill and now they have a son

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what's red and horny a red unicorn

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What do you call a man with no legs and no arms on your doorstep? Matt

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Why did Lucy have blond hair? Answer: Because both her parents had recessive hair traits.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote, puzzles still don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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