I have two friends, Jeffrey and Barbara. You might think that Jeffrey likes sports and beer, and that Barbara likes knitting and cooking. But you'd be wrong, Barbara is dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My fist

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A program that creates "pointless inventions" and posts them at the wrong sections.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

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Whats green? The color green.

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what did the dog say to the muppet? WOOF

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Q: What's better than the Call Me Maybe video? A: A shot-for-shot parody of it featuring a GIMP! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFxnAITCv5o

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Why didn't the chicken cross tithe road Because it was a motorway

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What do you get when you mix Obama and Chief Keef? OBLLAMA

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What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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You know what they called Obama in highschool? Nigge*

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a mexican, a asian and a black guy are in a car whos driving? your mom

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Contrary to the popular saying, "An apple a day keeps the doctor away," if you get cancer there's nothing an apple can do...

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What do people call baby cats in Alabama? Kittens.

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Once a man asked a lady working at the supermarket, Can I see your avocados? She kindly walked him over to the rack where they were being held.

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Hey, do you wanna hear a joke? A joke.

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Yes, it's for the patiënt in the other room.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in water? Drowning

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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why didn't the Asian ask for a calculator cause he was doing the dishes and a calculator seemed inappropriate

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the boy fell, because he hit a bump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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