A baby seal walks into a club.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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Advice from a pro: Don't be a faggot

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin says "oh my god were going to die!" The other says "Holy shit a talking muffin!"

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So i was thinking of going to japan for spring break. I've heard they have some awesome swells.

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Why did the Muslim guy look nervous and sweaty when the plane took off? Because he is claustrophobic. Racist fucks

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-I once had a dog with no legs, and do you know how I named him? -...? -I didn't name him, he wouldn't come...

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Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

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Miley Cyrus.

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Joe Paterno dosn't walk into a police station.-South Park

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a black man jumps in a pool.

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Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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What's broken to the side of the road and covered in cookie crumbs? A girlscout that got hit by a car.

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How do you get rid of a stalker? You throw a fridge at them!

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i like cats

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After Fighting Apollo creed. Rocky screams ADRIAN!!!! After 3 days of cardiac arrest he realises that ardian is a fregment on his imagination

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Hear the one about the giraffe and the clown? Yes.

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What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

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What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

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How do you call a black man? By his first name.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trick Question. Baby's aren't smart enough comprehend changing light bulbs

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Simon says; "You're adopted."

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A baby seal walked into a club.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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