"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

Your mother is so succsessfull that she can have any job she wants, she is probally going to stick with her current job though, She is a lawyer.

Women's rights... Are a legitimate concern in today's society.

People eat. Thats because we poop. No its the other way around. Sloppy Joes. Thats what my poop looks like. Oh no im eating poop in between two buns!

69

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

A seal walks into a club.

How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

What's white on the top and black on the bottom? Society.

Knock Knock Who's There? 9/11 9/11 who? You said you'd never forget.

who is still together after all the crap they have been through? your butt cheeks

A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

British Dentistry

Yeah Aodhans been typing up everything strting argument along with taggart

What did the mime say when he met the clown. Nothing.

What stinks and comes out of someones mouth. Bad Breath

What did the rap singer say to the other rap singer? "You just got served. Here, read this subpoena and sign it, verifying your understanding of the document."

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

What did the the policeman say to the band member who trashed a hotel room? "You're under arrest" The band member replied "Well, you're under a vest" The policeman reiterates that this isn't the time to be making any jokes and that vandalism is a very serious offence

What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

I saw a man one day i saw him the next day and the next and the next i didn't see him ever again

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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