Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree? No

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U know what they say about big shoes? Big socks

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with a dinosaur? Beastiality

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What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

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want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

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What did Helen Keller see on her trip? Nothing

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(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

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*spongebob voice* 25

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What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

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What do you call a Nazi in an airplane? Above sea level

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What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

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Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Baby you think i loved you, but you got played too

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Neither does he.

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- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

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What's green and gets people high? A green helicopter

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did you hear about the man who crossed the road? he made it.

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Q: What did the chinese man say to the other Chinese man? A: I don't know, I don't sneak Chinese

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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