If olive oil is made of olives, calculate the mass of the sun.

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The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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What happened to Jim. He died his funeral is tomorrow.

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Whats why was the 18 year old boy scared of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What did the Canadian Goose say to the Snow Goose? You're white.

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What is blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint!

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

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1st guy: Wanna hear a joke? 2nd guy: Yeah sure. 1st guy: Me too.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm horny and your bodily figure is very attractive Get naked

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

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A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

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Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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Where did Lucy go went the bomb went off? Everywhere

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Why does Michael Jackson have difficulty playing chess? Because he's dead, and if there is an afterlife, we don't actually have the ability to know that it is possible to play chess there.

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One day a man runs into a bar. He is already drunk and jumps through the window. This is illeagal, so he was arrested, stoned and killed.

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What do you call a black person with food stamps? A freeloader.

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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Compton

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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