What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

a black guy and a mexican are in the backseat of a car, who's driving the car? the owner of the car.

Why don't blind people own cats? They do, who told you that?

Why was the legless man out of his wheelchair? He fell down some stairs.

How do you make a baby cry? You leave it unattended

when god gives you lemons you better hope he also gives you sugar or your lemonade is going to suck

What do gay horses eat? A combination of straw and legumes, much like heterosexual horses do.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart but your body rejected the transplant and you died.

roses are red violets are blue ill cut your dick off and use it as glue

What's worse than heartbreak? Getting run over by a steamroller.

Why are there so many jokes about people walking into bars? Bars are known as a place most people go to for a social occasion, making them a place that most people can relate with.

there is a man swimming in the ocean with a tree in the ground eating him up so , the cantelope asks the microwave where is the store the microwave says nothing because it is an inanimate object and cannot speak even though the cantelope can which is unfortunate

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

What is green and sticky and oozes up a kid's upper lip? A homesick booger.

Q :What do you call a cow running through a field? A: Bob

wanna hear a joke? no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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