what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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You.

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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Hi

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Why did the black man perform well? Because he was a well trained musician by the name of Stevie Wonder.

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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