A man called his dentist and asked when he should make an appointment. The dentist told him to come in around two thirty pm because that's when the next appointment was available.

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A blond, teen girl with a pink hat and glasses goes to the doctor, and she says, "Doctor, doctor! I keep hearing bees, whislting, humming birds, and Tom Jones! Whats happening to me?!" The doctor says, "Tinnitus".

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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What's the difference between a badger and a TV? Alot.

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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Roses are red, violets are blue Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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When's the best time to go to the dentist? When you have an appointment.

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The dog buried it's bone. The next day it unburied it, and chewed on it until it was wrecked.

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Three ladies were seen eating ice cream. One of them was licking the ice cream. Another was sucking the ice cream and the other was biting the ice cream. One of these ladies is currently married. Which one among them is the married lady? The one with a wedding ring on.

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Why did the boy have no friends? Because he was autistic.

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whats funnier than a penguin playing a banjo? i don't know because I've never seen one and probably never will because it is a highly improbable event.

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Why did the little girl get a new tricycle? To cope with her father's death

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A horse walks into a bar the barkeeper asks 'Why the long face?' The horse, incapable of speaking English, walked around in a circle, excreated and left.

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A man opens his refrigerator and takes out a can of soda. He returns back to his living area and continues watching television.

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You copy and paster!

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What did santa say to the little girl on Christmas Eve? Santa isn't real, but pedophiles are.

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What's worse than finding a repeated joke on Anti-Joke? Your family being massacred in front of your eyes.

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How do you spell dog? C-A-T!

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What does the Cookie Monster eat? Nothing. The Cookie Monster is not a living, sentient being and does not require sustenance to live.

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I don't know what I've been told I'm a refrigerator

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A one legged long jumper missed the world record by one foot.

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Anyone reading this I'm not writing anything Kevin

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What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

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Mexicans are like waffles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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