What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

What happened when the Texan saw snow for the first time? He said "Oh my goodness this is cool"

What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

What does Pontiac stand for? Nothing. Pontiac's were discontinued

knock knock whos there !!!!!.....WE.....ARE.......SPARTANSSSS.....!!!!!!

Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

Why did the train crash? Because the conductor was a cucumber.

knock knock how there me ok come in

What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

What did the house do when it came alive? It went home

Why couldn't the basketball player jump anymore? Because he broke his back.

Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

there once was a guy named james who like to play video games he was told one day that he was gay and he immediatley consulted a priest for reconciliation

What do you call a joke without a punchline?

This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

roses are red violets are blue you know what? im sick and tired of this joke.

A ginger was with his friends

"Have you ever seen a blacksmith?" "No." "Me neither."

What's the difference between a black guy and a piece of chicken? They were once both alive and innocent. I lied about the black guy.

A Black man and a Hispanic man were sitting in the back seat of a car. Who was driving? Their Asian friend who offered to take them to get lunch.

A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

PENIS

Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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