What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

What do you call a successful black man who owns millions? Either a criminal or a fictional character.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car.

We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

Why was the trucker making noises? It was having sex with someone

How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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