Q: what happens when Justin Bieber walks into bar? A: three things, blood on the bar floor, another vister at the celebrity hospital, and Justin Bieber with knifes and darts stuck in his chest!

What did Sir Mix a lot say to the girl with a big butt? Your very beautiful.

Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

There is a terrorist attack. Muslims are blamed for it.

Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

what is yellow and burns? -a fire

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

Dr.Octagonapus.... BLAAAAAArGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jackalope :)

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

When the sun goes down... Most of the guys pants goes down too. Just be straight XD

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

what did the jew get for christmas? nothing Jewish people don't celebrate christmas

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

2 Priests and a Monk walk into a bar, All 3 were stabbed to death in a bar fight.

Q:Whats the difference between NBC and the NBA? A: The NBA is the National Basketball Assocation and NBC is The No Body Cares.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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