Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

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Tony Soprano walks into a diner

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

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What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? I don't know, why don't you go ask him?

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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