"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

Q: How much dirt is in a hole 3 by 6 by 2 feet? A: There's no dirt, it's a hole.

What did one Platypus say to the other Platypus? Nothing, Platypuses can't talk. However, they are the only mammal to lay eggs.

What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

you gay?

Why was Susie crying? There was a frog stapled to her face.

Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

Roses are red Violets are blue I would love you But you are too ugly and overweight

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

Q: how do you drown a blond A: put a mirror at the bottom of a pool

A: Knock Knock B: 7

Did you hear about the monkey in the tree? Oh no wait. It was a lizard.

Why did the baby cry? Because he fell off a refrigerator.

Who is the Greek god of STDS? Herpies

hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

What dinosaur makes honey? The Bee Rex.

What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

What's the easiest way to become President? Have a background in politics and a catchy campaign slogan that voting Americans can relate to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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