What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

Yo momma so ugly she looks like a penis

Whats a Quires favorite type of sport?--- A contact sport

8

If you and Chuck Norris have five dollars you both have the same amount of money.

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

Why are black people ghetto? Because they are black.

So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

it was a breazy night my pecker was shriveld up like a loose bit of ham. i tucked it in between my legs and dicided to pull my pants down to my ancles and began to run like a sissy. i saw a stumpy little juice ed in the distance it was peter andre he told me that he wanted a slut fucken and said he wanted to pull my banjo right back to the balls and suck it till the moon goes down i cumed all over his glasses then we began to kiss i bent over for him and he stook is fat fucken trout in my dark tight cave there was swet dripping from my cock aka carl mcvittie

knock knock who is there? Jehovah's Witness... IT IS the desire of Jehovah's Witnesses that you become better acquainted with them. You may have met them as neighbors and fellow employees or in other daily affairs of life. You may have seen them on the street, offering their magazines to passersby. Or you may have spoken briefly with them at your door. Actually, Jehovah's Witnesses are interested in you and your welfare. They want to be your friends and to tell you more about themselves, their beliefs, their organization, and how they feel about people and the world in which all of us live. To accomplish this, they have prepared this brochure for you. In most ways Jehovah's Witnesses are like everyone else. They have normal problems—economic, physical, emotional. They make mistakes at times, for they are not perfect, inspired, or infallible. But they try to learn from their experiences and diligently study the Bible to make needed corrections. They have made a dedication to God to do his will, and they apply themselves to fulfill this dedication. In all their activities they seek guidance from God's Word and his holy spirit.

what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

u jelly?

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

Why did suzy fall of the swing? -she had no arms... Why couldn't she get back up? -she had no friends

A black man and a jew both fall off a cliff, who hits the ground first? the black man

Flop dog

Why did Timmy fall off the swings? -Because he had no arms Knock knock! Who's there? Not Timmy

What's the difference between a fine wine and a dead baby in a blender? One gets better as it ages, and the other is a horrific accident.

what is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? -one is the chosen people of Isreal and one is a food that was founded in Italy

Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

Ask me if you can see my dinosaur. Can I see your dinosaur? No dinosaurs don't exist sillyhead!

Guess how old my lil bro is...Well your wrong cause he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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