Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he happened to be walking in that general direction.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

What's white and sticky? Glue.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? - It was dead.

A dog walks into a bar and asks for a pint.. But is immediately turned away as dogs are not allowed in pubs.

Why are blondes stupid? They are not. Its just in America society has been given that impression through inaccurate and crude jokes.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Why did the the man not take acting? He wasn't good at it.

Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

what did the poor kid get from santa? Nothing santa hates poor kid, but the rich kid got a very nice convertable.

Hey man how was your trip? great!!! It blew my mind

Roses are red Violets are red Oh god I'm bleeding It's getting in my eyes

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

A black guy walks into a bar. When he saw the white bartender's bar he got offended. There were heads of hunted animals on the walls. He works for PETA.

why did the chicken cross the road? because he happened to cross the road

Q: John has 400 cookies, 200 hundred are chocolate chip and the rest are sugar. John eats 100 of each, what does he have now? A: Diabetes

Two gay guys walk into a Hooters... They order cheese fries and enjoy their meal.

Why did the President Truman approve the use a nuke over Hiroshima? Sending Chuck Norris was widely considered to be too cruel.

Why was the teacher laying on the floor? Because shes dead...

There once was a man from Nantucket. He still lives there.

I used to be an adventurer like you... then I enlisted for much safer guard service with a more steady salary.

roses are red, violets are blue my name is hitler, good bye jew

How many black people does it take to change a light bulb. One, of course. Assuming he/she does not have any physical or mental handicaps.

two goldfish are in a tank they swim around happily and have no consciousness of what is happening because of their short memory.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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