Im ashamed of being from Canada

thumb_up thumb_down -173

Why was the bear gay. He grew up in a disfunctional home.

thumb_up thumb_down +120

What do you call it when a black guy runs down a hill? A male of African descent sprinting down a geographical landform that extends above the surrounding terrain.

thumb_up thumb_down +112

What's worse than getting kicked by a horse? Drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

What's the difference between Justin Beeber and a Basett hound? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Whats worse than dying? Nothing, really.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What has 142 teeth and can hold back the hulk? My zipper.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what do you call a pig that knows karate? pork-chop!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't the man eat the carrots? Because he was a vegetarian.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? He had heard from a mutual friend that his ex-girlfriend, who he had recently broken up with, would be present at the same party and to avoid an awkward encounter he chose not to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what is the difference between having sex and having sex on my period ..... i have something to drink when i have sex on my period

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? BECAUSE SHE WAS A BITCH!

thumb_up thumb_down -62

What's the difference between a black man and a pile of shit ? One is a black man, the other is a pile of shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -128

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -164

why did the kid fall over and break his neck? Because he slipped on the ice-cream from the kid who got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why couldn't the Irishman walk in a straight line? Because he was a retard.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why did the boy eat the potato? I don't know. Neather do I. :(

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's brown and sticky? Human excrement.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why do chinese firefighters wear white belts in their firefighting uniforms? So the their pants stay up.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops