what is faster than a cheetah? i dont know what? if i knew why would i be asking..

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A man goes to his drug dealer to buy Meth, there is no joke here, he is addicted to meth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have not seen chicken since I was very young, on my parents' farm. This is before the Cossacks slaughtered them. I can still hear screams of sister as soldiers ravaged her. But back to question, where did you see chicken? I am very, very hungry.

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Why did the man shut up? because he was told to

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why do pedo's molest children? because it feels really good.

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What did jell say to the carriage driver from Uzbekistan that was underpaid and had no banter? Oh My God ROFLMAOOTG (the last three are "on the ground") "I will beat you with a small child that I will soon feed to the T-Rex's" should be on the list.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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Tell somebody that someone told you they look like an owl. When they say "Who?" laugh in their face

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What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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No one walks into a bar. It is closed.

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I dont no the difference between their and there

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What did little Jimmy say when he met God ? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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Yo mama so fat, she was accepted to a clinical trial for treatment of morbid obesity in middle-aged women.

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what is hollow and bloody? Vagina when it gets genital herpes

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A Jew, an African American, and a homosexual are on an island. They all came to Manhattan for different reasons and are enjoying the lives they've built there.

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What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

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The prefix "con" means bad. The prefix "pro" means good. So what is the opposite of progress? Regress.

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what's worse than finding 8 babies in 1 trash can? nuclear warfare

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a man died

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? It didn't. She was capable of loving and caring for a dog.

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How can you tell your woman is cheating on you? When you witness her having sexual relations with another man that she is clearly enjoying.

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There was a goat and it was eating McDonalds, I just farted and my nuts are itchy.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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