What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He wakes up the next morning in a jail cell covered in blood. 3rd time this week.

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Why didn't the kid return home after school? He was having a sleep-over with a bunch of his friends. Who all died from a robbery.

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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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A boy asks his teacher for a eraser....he was given a blue pen. Turns out he was in space.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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What would you do if Spider Man gave you super powers like his? Nothing. Spider Man is not real therefore you are most likely dreaming and need to wake up soon.

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

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What happened to the man who had the most loving parents and family when he was born, had an amazing childhood which he shared with so many good friends, was loved everywhere, helped the poor, started a fundraiser for starving kids in africa, got a college education, helped a complete stranger get off his drug addiction, married a beautiful woman, bought a nice house and had 3 children who he loved dearly and spent time with as much as he possibly could, tucked them in every night and enjoyed every second of his life as if it was his last? He died.

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Open up.

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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Guess what?..... I once saw a black man who had a job that wasnt on work release........

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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What's more absurd than a goldfish astronaut? A jew that cares about palestinians

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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