A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

Jacob Mckeand licks his gooch everynight. Some nights he even covers it in maple syrup. 'mmmmm' he thinks to himself as he licks his 7 inch gooch up and down.

What is better than winning the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

What do you call a 30 year old man with a large white van full of kids? A parent carpooling to the soccer game.

"Doctor, doctor! I think I've got Chlamydia!" "Yes, so you have told me. The urine sample you provided me with last week has come back positive. I'm sorry, sir, but you'll never be able to have children."

Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

Knock knock, come in.

shook hands with Marty ,talked about politics, then walked away.

Your mama so stupid, she put 2 quarters in her ears and said she was istening to Fiftycent

Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

Q:why did the girl fall off the swing set? A:she had no arms

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Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

What is both dead and alive at the same? nothing, thats scientifically impossible you fool

Why was the mouse flying? Because an Owl picked it up, carried it to a tree and ate it.

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

How do you keep Helen Keller distracted? Find a stimulating device that blind and deaf people can operate correctly.

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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