HOLY SHIT ITS AN AIRPANE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

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I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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What do you get when you don't wear protection? A baby.

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A scientist walks into a bar. His forehead becomes swollen.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

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What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

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how do you keep a blonde busy for 7 to 8 hours. you give her m&m's and tell her to spell a word.

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What walks on it's hands My uncle

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AIDS

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Q. At the main menu why are there two people sad? A. Because there is.

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Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

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What did the hobo find on the ground? A dirty nipple. ~Logan F.

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What do you get when you cross a confused man and an anti-social woman? I don't know, go away.

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What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

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What did the rednecks say when they saw the bat? Ma, I'm afraid this is the Myotis Sodalis, or Indian Bat. It is an endangered species. Thus, we cannot shoot it.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

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roses are red violets are blue you might think i can write poems but, bit i really really can't

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Your Momma is so old, she started exercising more and eating healthier to increase the chance of her living long enough to enjoy your own children's lives.

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nick ya honkin of b.o m8

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Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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