Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

OK, Billy went to his friend Fred in the tree. And then went inside to get a snack. Then Fred fell out of the Tree and.....landed on a comfy mattress.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

thumb_up thumb_down -13

I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happens when you put a baby in the microwave? I don't know, cause I was to busy jerking off.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

thumb_up thumb_down -13

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -15

while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops