Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

Q: Wy did the Araib cross the road? A: To open another gas station.

whats white and big and white? alot of things...

What did taxi driver say to the passenger? Where to, sir?

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

What's worse than a broke pencil TWO broken pencilz

What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

What did the Momma Kangaroo say when she couldnt find her baby?

what do you call a black man flying a plane?? a pilot ,you racist!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

How do you call a hispanic man crossing the border? First you must find out his phone number, then using a different phone make a phone call to him.

Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

How did the black person die? Of old age

If your reading this you will realize that this sentence means nothing and I have just taken 5 seconds of your life that you'll never get back.

What did the Christian say to the Muslim? Our faiths are actually derived from the same Judeo base.

Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

You're a fat chubby McChubchub fatty fatchub because your fat chubby McChubchubfattychub poop is on your fatty fat Mcphat face of fatchubness because you are the fatty lord of McChubby fat kings.

Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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