Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red, violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you get a little kid out of a tree Throw a jar of foreskin at him

thumb_up thumb_down +11

a fish swimming in the water swims

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what is the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Six Jews get on a train. They all safely arrive at their locations.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the man with AIDS say to the other man? I have AIDS and will most likely succumb to the disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

there's a blonde and a brunette jumping out of a plane, what one hits the ground first? they both hit at the same time because gravity pulls everything down towards the earth at the same pace

thumb_up thumb_down +11

200,000 people are homeless! ...this year in america!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Moooo

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Abbott! Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door! The door was never answered because they did not know the person at the door.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops