Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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What did the Jewish man say when he answered the phone? Hello?

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I saw a "Baby on Board" bumper sticker on a car TARGET AQUIRED

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Yo mama's has so much acne, I decided to give her proactive.

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what did the horse say to the bartender? why the short face?

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? She didn't, women belong in the kitchen.

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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We live in a world.... Yeah its called Earth.

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Why did little Johnny fall off his swing? He had no arms.

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What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Are you from Tenessee? I heard you were from there

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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How long does it take a black woman to have a baby? Nine months, give or take a few days depending on whether she goes into labour early or not.

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Why was Little Billy crying? He had an axe embedded in his chest.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting doctor. Interupting doc- You have aids.

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willie revilame

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How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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