Why did the chicken cross the road? Simply because he stopped and looked both ways.

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How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

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How do you get your little brother to stop kicking you? Stick his feet in the garbage disposal.

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Top Gear USA

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What did the little orphan girl get for christmas? nothing her parents are dead

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what do you call a black man flying a plane?? a pilot ,you racist!

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

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Catholicism.

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Once upon the time.... It was 12 o´clock

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Why didn't the girl get on the school bus? It was Sunday.

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If there are 50 oranges and 50 waffles tied to a fence post. How many cow utters does it take to shit green? urine.

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Hey, what’s your problem? I’m a Catholic whore currently enjoying congress out of wedlock with my black, Jewish boyfriend who works in a military abortion clinic. So, hail Satan, and have a lovely afternoon, madam. a.w. j.p.

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Whats yellow and gives you cancer? The sun

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Whats worse than finding half of a worm in your apple? Noticing the apple is oversized and finding half of a dead baby.

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This one sucks!

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what do you call someone who hates jews anti semitic

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What do you call a sandwich that has sandwich on it? A sandwich.

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It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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Why was the boy in hospital? He fell off the bus and was run over by many cars.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the little boy cry regularly? Because his father was sexually abusive.

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How do you scare a Jew Hold your lighter up and blow out the flame and I've toward him real slowly and see how much drama he'll cause

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops