Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Brian. Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

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What do you call a mummy that falls into the Nile? Wet

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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How does one propagate a humorous reaction from peers and associates while not utilizing such characteristics as whit, jocularity, substance or auspicious punch lines? That's what she said.

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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Have you tried Honeybunches of Oats?

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

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Why couldn't Prince William go to the party? Because his WIFE bought tickets to the f**cking ballet.

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What is even bigger than an elephant? A gi-ant! (Wait you did say an anty joke right!?)

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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Why did the baby die? It got shot.

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Animal

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Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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