What's big and messy? A big mess

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Onions are like loved ones... They are both nouns. And you cry when you cut into them.

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley full of aluminium cans, He took them to the scrapyard and sold them as this is his only source of income right now

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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Why did the gay man die? He had AIDS

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A blind guy walks into a bar because he can't see.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk, idiot.

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What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

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politically correct!

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a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

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Black people

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A black man walks into an abbatoir.

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Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's alright now.

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Whats Black and White and Red all over? A white boy who just got jumped, with sever bruises left lying in a pool of his own blood.

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Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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what did the boy say? please please please please goout with me

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What's worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Stalin? Nothing because pineapples aren't vegetables.

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How do you make time fly? Well! You cannot really make time fly. Imean, yeah, iguess it feels like time flies when your having fun, but it moves just as fast as always!

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Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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