I like my wine just like how I like my woman 5 years old and in my basement.

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

I woke up in bed with someone this morning. I forget why this is a joke, but your mother is a whore.

Faithful men.

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

Whats small white and has a hole in it? A powdered Donut

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

A piece of paper got wet. I stuck it over the fireplace to dry off, but it lit on fire.

How do you get a black person out of a tree? Tell them to come down

Where did the little boy go after the explosion? Everywhere.

why was the blonde confused? because she was born with a low IQ making her mentally retarded.

A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

How do you get Pikachu onto a bus? You ask him politely.

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

what did luke say to darth vader? Can i borrow ur car please.

What do you call a prostitute with morals? Ironic.

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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