-Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Willis. -Wills who? -IT'S ME WILLIS. YOUR SON! -Whatchu talking bout Willis, I ain't got no son. -Remember Bill, my father? I was conceived on your 20th birthday party. .... - Is he fat white Bill, Mexican Bill, or Billette the shemale? And thus, poor Willis jumps off a bridge, committing suicide, because his biological mother turns out to be a shemale screwing whore.

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What's green, fuzzy, and can kill you if it fell from a tree? A pool table.

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Do you knpow why Michael Jackson is not dead? Dumbass, he IS dead...

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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A man walks into a bar. A few hours later he walks out.

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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What do you call this? A sentence in English.

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roses are blue violetrs are green im shooting heroine into my head

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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what did the man say to the sad woman? go make ma a sammich before i hit you again! the women refused and was hit again.

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Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock,knock Who's there? Apple Apple who? Knock, knock Who's there? Lemon Lemon who? Lemon know if you want me to say apple again

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes, how may I help you?

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Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Another holocaust.

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What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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whats worse than finding half a worm in your apple? being wrongly accussed of a crime you didnt commit because of your race, and being put on death row

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Why are there so many little girls falling off swing jokes? Because you tuch youself at night.

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What's the longest word in the English language? Tuna. (I lied about it being the longest word in the language.)

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Why did suzie fall off the swing? Cause she had no arms. Why didn't she get back on the swing? cause she had no legs. Why didn't anyone help her up? Cause she had no friends. Why did she stay their all night? cause she had no family.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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so...um, yeah

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Laugh.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops