What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic and so am i

When life throws you lemons, duck.

How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Adam Claypool walks into a bar. He immediately sucks the bartender's dick because he is the biggest queer anyone has ever seen

Why do you not play poker with a cheetah. 1. Animals can't play card games. 2. Cheetahs are carnivores. Think about it.

Knock knock Who's there? Death. Come with me.

What's worse than finding a fly in your coffee? The holocaust. What's worse than that? Two flies in your coffee.

what did the blind kid want for christmas? world peace.

What's the difference between a truckload of dead babies and a truckload of bowling balls? You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

whats sad about 4 black people in a cadalic fallign over a cliff? it wasnt there car

what do you call a dead black man? dead

Q: Where does charlie sheen shop? A: Winners

What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Why did Jack got late to his date? Because he was playing Call of Duty and forgot about the time.

John Stamos.

Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

whats polish and black a polish black person

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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