What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding it in your nose.

What did one narwhal say to another Hi ;)

What is the favorite song of Lady Di? no, that is a dead person and must be respected.

Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

A bear walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender knows that bears can't talk and realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and rolls over to tell his wife about the dream. She hears the joke, but turns away from him and pretends to be asleep. Then the bartender begins to cry. His marriage is in shambles.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her.

What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

What's black and blue and red all over Sex

What do you eat for breakfast and is sometimes blue? Pancakes.

What's red and on fire? My crotch

whats gay and can do flips? A gymnast

If you are riding a horse, how many watermelons does it take to kill a giraffe? Platypus.

"Knock Knock" "Who the hell is it?" "Patri..." "Go the hell away!"

what's worse than getting a bad test grade? being raped.

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

What did Steegers say when he lost his TARDIS? "The niggers stole it again!"

What do you call a Chinese man flying plane? A pilot.

Why did the black man go to school? So he could graduate with a degree and persue his life in medicine. He later goes on to get his P.H.D. He now supports his healthy family of 5 and living in Idaho, the state of the potato. He has a job as a doctor and is making more than $2M a year. Ha, didn't expect that now did ya.

What did the rabbit say to the frog? If you think the rabbit said anything, you need to see a psychiatrist.

what do you call a black man on the moon? Kid Cudi

If I said "This AntiJoke will get thumbs up" It will get thumbs up

What happens when you put a squid in the microwave? It dies.

A kid walked in to a bar, grabbed a napkin, and left

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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