What did the child who tried to hang himself, but wasn't heavy enough to achieve breaking his neck do? Died slowly.

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Whats big brown and sticky A sappy oak tree

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how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

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Q: What do AIDS and rape have in common? A: If you play guard for the Lakers, neither will affect you.

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What did Osama bin Laden say to the Navy SEALS? Nothing. There was insufficient time to hold a conversation before they shot him in the face.

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Why did the man climb to top of the tower? To push the Jew off.

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Whats gayer than driving a prius Buttsex

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How do you know this is an Antijoke? Its on anti-joke.com

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I look back at all those hours I wasted playing those stupid video games, but then I'm reminded of all those people I brutally killed.

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Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

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A grasshopper walks into into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you. But me telling you this is in no way productive because insects cannot understand human language."

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What does a farmer say when he can't find his tractor? - Where's my tractor?

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Why did the man die from drinking the water? It wasn't water, it was acid.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

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neil patrick harris

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A married man, just realizes that his wife is cheating on him while he's away. But just to make sure, he goes into a spy shop to look for a camera to look in on his wife while he's not there. so he goes up to the shop keeper and asks " do you have any video camera's that record in on any place in a house?" the shop keeper says no and the man walks out of the store.

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Salad. It's green and so is The Hulk.

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- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

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Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

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A ginger was with his friends

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This is a funny anti-joke. But you probably don't get it.

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What's Mexico's favorite sport? Cross Country

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What does the orphan say to its parents? nothing, orphans dont have parents

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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