do you know what i see in the perfect girl? my dick.

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me:I will trade you 5 dollars for 10 dollars blond: Okay! me: ...

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Why couldn't the little boy see anything? It was dark outside.

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jack shine has boobs

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Whats worse than scraping your elbow and knee? Beheading and disembowlment.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a large dog on its side of the road attempting to harass it.

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What do you call a pickle that is sad? A pickle!????

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American Idol

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Any idea of his whereabouts Nero? I am the leader, I fund this myself, as you know money is not my problem, its rather loyalty.

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You better run like your ass is under fire, because it will be if you don't.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What did the bird say to the squirrel? Chirp

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a

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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How is it possible for a man to get raped? Easy. He lied.

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2

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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Did you see the blind man get hit by a car? Neither did he.

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There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

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Women's Rights

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Why don't women need watches? Because they have clocks on their cell phones because they have jobs outside of the house and are INDEPENDENT WOMEN! MEN DO NOT DEFINE THEM!

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How do Ethiopians celebrate Christmas? They don't there to worried about dying from Aids and starvation

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What a russian says to another russian? I don't know, but it must be somthing in russian.

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Knock Knock. Come in. -mattobrado

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops