Q: how many babies does it take to paint a house red? A: It Depends on how hard you throw them

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Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

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What looks like half a loaf of bread. The other half

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why did the man hop everywhere? He only had one leg

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What's green and blue, and red all over? Nothing. It if were red all over it wouldn't be green and blue.

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Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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My Muslim friend is always late to everything. We call him 9/12.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

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What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

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So theres a man, a horse, and a piglet in a helicopter. Upon noticing this, the pilot jumps out of the plane and the animals go crashing to their doom.

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What did the boy say when he could'nt find his dog? I wonder where Spot went.

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How do you get 2x1=4? Do the wrong math.

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Interrupting kid with ADHD" *I did not respond, as I knew he would interrupt me before I was able to finish the sentence.*

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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FUCK THE JEWS

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how do you delete your joke off anti-joke? you don't.

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What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

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What do you call a man covered in bees? Nothing, you'll startle the bees!

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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