whitney housten was supposed to sing at my funeral... but i dont think thats gonna happen. ;(

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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At a feminist picnic there are no sandwiches.

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A dwarf walked into a pizza shop and ordered a large pepperoni pizza advertised as $12.50. He gave some money to the man behind the counter who then said, "Sir, you're a little short." The dwarf replied, "My apologies, I thought I had given you a twenty." He gave the man behind the counter the difference he owed, took his pizza and left.

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What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

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A large commercial airliner is piloted toward inner-city New York. The plane is driven into the World Trade Center by a terrorist. The United States will now issue a holiday to mourn all we have lost in this tragic event.

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Justin Bieber

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A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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This joke is not funny, So don't read it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, Show me your ti ts.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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Say silk 5 times. Silk Silk Silk Silk Silk Now what do cows drink? Water.

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What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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im a dragon, no im not

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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