What do you get when you jab a four year old with a pair of scissors? A warrant for your arrest.

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roses are red violets are blue i use refrigerators to keep my food cool

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Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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Did you know, even though penguins ARE birds... They don't live in volcanoes?

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

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What do you call a dead black person? A corpse.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car.

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What did Anne Frank do this weekend? Nothing. she died in the holocaust.

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Do you know whats sad? Global Warming Do you know why the polar bears are dying? Aids

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A Jew, a Catholic, and a Muslim walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What'll you have?" The Jew says, "I'll have a whiskey straight." The Catholic says, "I'll have a vodka tonic." The Muslim says, "I can't drink it's against my religion and I really shouldn't be here."

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" ding dong " person in side: wait aren't u supposed to knock knock

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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how do you get all the people in ireland out of their homes? roll a potato down the road. how do you find the richest person in ireland? you find the one who got the patato

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

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Why was Abraham Lincolin President. He was elected by the people of the united states.

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Why did the fireman go to the police station? He didn't go to the police station, he went to the fire station.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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Sarah Palin

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MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

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What is a bad thing to see and is attached to a boy's body. The middle finger u dumb ass!

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops