Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't.

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I wouldn't consider the Titanic sinking to be a disaster, ????It is better down where it is wetter under the sea! ????.

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Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

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Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

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Why do you touch yourself at night? Because I do too

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Why does the Green Giant's vegetables taste funny? He stands over his peas and corn.

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Ding Dong! Who's the - - - wait - - - I don't have a doorbell.

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How do you keep a black man out of your back yard? Tell him to go away.

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Your momma went to the gym, because she is fat.

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9-11 please state your emergency. My house is flooding! Dad, youre in the swimming pool.

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What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

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HEY YOU!!!!

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A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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How do mummies keep there secrets wrapped up? They are dead.

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more chocolate?

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Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

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A duck flew calmly through the air and landed softly on a beautiful lake, where he was then shot for trespassing.

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So a man walks into a bar, asks for a beer, then drinks it. He then goes home expecting to have dinner with his wife and 2 kids. His wife smells his breath before that and asks him what happens. The men opens to his true and only love and tells her he's having a bad time at work. So they share a hug and talk about it. The man is then renewed, starts pulling up at his job and gets a promotion to general supervisor. He lives happily and watches his kids grow and become professionals. He then dies of a heart attack at the advanced age of 89 while he was watching his favorite TV show.

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A. THERE'S SOMETHING ON YOUR FACE B. WHAT?!? *PUNCH* A. IT WAS PAINNNNNNNNN

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hey i just met you and this is crazy i just had bath salts your face looks tasty!

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit. What's worse than a dead baby in a clown suit? Ten dead babies in a trash-can. What's worse than ten dead babies in a trash-can? One dead babie in ten trash-cans.

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What did the black man say to the other black man? We both share the same ethnicity

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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