a little boy takes his lacrosse stick to his mom and says "hey mom this is bob" the mom says "hi bob" and she says to her son "does bob say hi back?" and the boy says "no mom. hes a lacrosse stick."

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There was a man sinking in quick sand. He looked in the sky and said, "God, if you spare my life, I'll be a great person and believe in you all my life." He died.

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

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How did the black man cross the road after 5 years of trying to and getting hit by cars every time? some1 put KFC on the other side. MrBounty44

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Feeling that your friends do not listen to your insightful conversations? BUY A PARROT! Teach it to say "Uhuh", and "Ahah", and "Dats coo!" NOW YOU CAN BE COMPLETELY APRECIATED BY A FUCKING BIRD THAT DOES NOT KNOW WHAT YOU ARE SAYING... ...BUT IS IT... APPRECIATING IT? DUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN! MYSTERY!

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Roses are red, Violets are green, get in my bed, if you know what I mean.

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24

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He's dead now.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You're a virgin.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because he felt he had nothing left to live for

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How do you starve a black man? Tell welfare to cancel food stamps

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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What did the homeless man say to his friends? He doesn't have any friends.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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How do you make a puppy stop barking? Throw a brick at it.

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Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

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knock knock, Whos there ?? Johnny. Come in fish.

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what do u say when u see your tv floating in the middle of the night? drop it n*****

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A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

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Why didn't Superman save the people from 9/11? Because he was a quadriplegic.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A co-pilot

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Q-What did the hobo get for Christmas? A-Pneumonia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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