A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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why do you kill people in call of duty you don't you kill computer made figures

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How much do polar bears weigh? Between 800 and 1600 pounds

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

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Justin Port#$ falls out of a tree. What happens? he breaks his neck and unfortually dies a long painful death.

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What did the Watermelon say to its baby? I'll SEED you later!

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How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

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whats worse than getting bit by a tick. getting bit by a deer tick that as lyme disease.

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Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

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josh moran where your Bluetooth gone?

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So a guy walks in to a bar.... and orders a beer.

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

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Why was the jewish boy crying? i lied he was happy.

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What's red and funny? The holocaust

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why dose micheal jackson like 29 year olds Because there is 20 of them

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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Dad: Blind side was the black kid who played tight end. Me: Offensive line. Dad: Sorry, African American kid.

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What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why? Because.

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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