What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

J?????????????????o??????????????????????k?????????????????????????e?????????????????????????????????????s??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????o??????????????????????n??????????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????y???????????????????????????????????o????????????????????????????????u????????????????????????????????.?????????????????????????????.????????????????????.????????????????????????

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

knock knock whos there your mother open the door

wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

I used to get on Facebook, then someone asked me to save a child in Africa by liking a picture of Jesus or ignore it and go to hell

Wanna hear another joke? Wes Trillows penis!!!

Cum on guys....gay jokes are mean

Why did the black man have blood on his hands? He was a surgeon

What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

How can you tell if someone's a Vegan? It will probably come up in conversation, usually during the planning phase of a trip to a restaurant.

If Chuck Norris has $5 and you have $5... that's $10.

What do boats and starving children have in common? They both float, except for the starving children.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting eaten alive by midgets with down syndrome

why do prostitutes do what they do? Because they have abusive fathers who always used them as sex slaves as children

Whats the saddest part about the sandy hook shooting? There were still bullets in the clip... Im going to hell by the way.

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car? A: Well, it varies on the size of the car and the size of the people entering the car so in reality there is no clear answer due to the lack of information given.

roses are red violets are blue i am black and so r u

Ahem. Testicles. That is all.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...