It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

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What's dried up and smells like potatoes? Potato ships and school french fries.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

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Sam: This math homework is gay. Cory: You should pursue a romantic relationship with your gay math homework.

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s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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What did the toaster say to the raisin? Nothing. The toaster was mute and the raisin had lost his hearing in a terrible full-contact origami accident.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead baby joke? Dead baby jokes aren't funny.

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please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

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A dyslexic blind man

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No Nero, you see, a great man once told me that happiness is not something you look for and eventually find, but something that you decide that you already are.

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IMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM a beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee immmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmiiiiooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmoooooooooooodfssgihsfdiug

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He then shortly died in his sleep due to heart failure at the age of 81.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ted. Come in.

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Whats red and smells like black paint Red paint

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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I don't always drink beer but when I do, I viciously beat my wife and children.

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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What do you call five gay men walking in the same direction? I don't know the usual human does not take note of such circumstance.

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops