What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

Knock Knock Who's there? Reality, we have come to install a doorbell.

There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

*Knock Knock* Who's there? Abbott! Abbott who? Abbott time you answered the door! The door was never answered because they did not know the person at the door.

Q: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: None. Woodchucks have herbivorous diet mainly consisting of wild grasses, berries, as well as agricultural crops when they are available.

Why was Sally lying on the ground? Cause she was dead

i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

How did the black guy get out of prison? Further evidence in the case was found which proved that the black guy was actually donating blood to a local blood drive for children with leukemia.

what do you call cheese that's not yours? cheese that you stole.

What did cancer get for Christmas? Another 6 year old boy

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer we're both lawyers

What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

- Why Mexicans have small steering wheels in their cars? - Because of this they are able to drive a car in handcuffs.

There's a god, just kidding.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, that's why I'm asking you.

i was gunna write a joke..but i took an arrow to me knee.

if you dont like sponge bob refrences.......... THEN **DOLPHIN NOISE*** you

Why do girls have bumps around their nipples ? -it's brai for suck here .

Come on, I am trying to cheer you up a bit, honestly how high?

Q. Whats Brow and rhymes with Snoop? A Dr. Dre

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms.

A obese woman, a anorexic woman and a average weight woman sit down to eat. They all have a good time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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