What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

a bumble bee walked into a bar, looking tired and worn out. 'long day, eh?' said the barman. 'yes' replied the bee. 'i was flying along to collect some honey when i noticed a large obstical obstructing me. i stuck my pointy needle in it, and according to legend, i will die in short hours to come' suddenly michael jacksons thriller flicked on in the jukebox, the bumble bee boogied all night long until he slowly passes away in the early hours of the morning. long live boogie bee.

How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

Q. Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A. being physically disabled due to a preventable accident, thus leaving you incapable of doing activities that are easily completed by an able-bodied person

What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

What do you call a blonde who tries to swim on land? - Stupid.

What did the car do? CRASH!

Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

Black People.

a man walks into a bar, he is injured severely and needs medical attention stat, he is rushed to the hospital where he dies that evening

What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

Aladdin found a rusty old lamp at the foot of a mountain. He rubbed it and the Ginnie had died after the long drop from the cliff

What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Robin get in the car"

what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

Womans profesional lacrosse

What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

P.E.N.I.S P-enis E-nis N-is I-s S

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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